Bad, Apple, Bad!!

So in one of my hilarious yet relatable posts I made whilst writing for Running Down a Dream (and which I have imported to my awesome blog), I made reference to a particularly bad experience I recently had at the Apple store. Well, dear readers, allow me to elaborate that reference into today's dopeness post.

Being an avid collector of all new electronics (a hobby aided by the fact that I have my mother's credit card number!), even before Steve Jobs left the podium where he announced the 4th generation iPod Nano, I had already ordered one. With a sense of great anticipation, I awaited the arrival of my new iPod and began to dream of all the extreme runs I would have while using it. I took off work on the day it was to arrive and, when it finally did, I wasted no time in hitting the treadmills. That was on the Tuesday of that week. As the sun rose on the Friday of the same week, I awoke to the horror that I had broken yet another damn iPod (see yesterday's post for this issue as well)!!! While I knew it was a risk to use the new iPod without a case (because stupid Apple couldn't coordinate the iPod's release with the release of ANY case), I had wrapped it in many layers of paper towels and had been quick to dry it off when I got home after all my runs. Clearly, like any attempt I make at quitting Nicorette, these techniques proved useless. I had had my iPod for 3 days and it was broken.

The avid collector in me told me to forget about the broken Ipod and order a new one (again, my mother's credit card made my blase attitude possible). However, the not so little voice I heard on the other side of my brain, was in actuality my dopeness wife CVSW knowing what I was thinking and yelling at me to go to the Apple store and have it replaced. Because I am a family man, I decided to listen to CVSW and so, for me, it was off to the Apple store on 57th Street!!

My appointment with the apple technician (they are called geniuses, but really they are just condescending hippie's who need a manicure) was slated for 1:00am and began on-time. The dude looked at my iPod for two minutin and then told me that it was clear that my iPod had been submerged in water and the damage was out of warranty. He told me I could have it fixed for $89 (70% of the price of the iPod) or buy a new one, but in no case, would Apple give me a new one. I tried to maintain my calm and explained that I had had the thing for less than a week and that at no time had I submerged it in water. I told him of my penchance for sweating while running, but he said that sweat alone could not have caused the damage that my iPod was showing. With little more that this dude could do, and not desiring to be forced to smell the foul odours emanating from his scruffy beard, I asked to speak to a manager. The fellow left for 5 minutin and when he returned he was followed by a woman of some noticeable girth who's clear preference was 80gb.....80 Giant Burgers!!!!!

Anyways, to make a long story short, this manager examined my iPod and then told me that my iPod, like the many chins on her face, exhibited heavy water damage. Up until that night, I had been a huge Apple fan. I (or should I say, my mother)have bought tons of their products and have been happy with all of them. No more, dear readers!!! As the realization that nothing was going to happen dawned on me, I dejectedly took back my broken iPod and asked the technician if there was anybody else I could speak to. He said that the manager, who was still standing by me (with the way she was looking at me, I was worried she was contemplating eating me with a side of headphones), was the biggest person there to which I hilariously replied, "literally," and left the store.

Unfortunately, when I got home, I realized that I had no working MP3 player, and was thus forced to suck up any dignity I had left and return to the Apple store to purchase a new damn iPod.

If any of you readers out there has had a similar experience or has any helpful tips on what can be done, it would be much appreciated!